An Honest Discussion About Forever 21's Graphic T-Shirts

Kristin: I think if you searched for this phrase on Twitter, it could come up like 20 times. Also, what are you saying here? That you've never truly learned to love a human, only pizza?

Leo: This is really sad to me. I would not broadcast this sentiment on my boobs.

Kristin: Also, I think it's very interesting that this is basically the same thing as this Instagram caption from eight months ago. JUST SAYING.

Kristin: Isn't this the reason why people do most things? You might as well say: "I'm only breathing because it's part of the human experience."

Leo: This makes me miss the '90s when "like" was an actual emotion and people did things for more honorable reasons like money or sex. If I may invoke the words of the great Fred Durst: "I did it all for the nookie."

Leo: #What #the #fuck #is #this #fucking #dumb #shit.

Kristin: Look, youths, you're the ones who created hashtags. You made this internet bed, and now you must lie in it.

Leo: I still call it the number sign; apparently teens are unaware that it means this.

Kristin: I call it the pound sign!

Leo: Is this funny? Depresso heh heh. I might try saying this when the coffee runs out and see what happens.

Kristin: This is for the discerning woman who goes to the store and thinks, "I need a shirt that my awkward downstairs neighbor will reference every time I wear it."

Leo: Anytime I see lists like this, my inclination is to be like, "stop stereotyping women." But I really like doing all the things on this shirt (well, maybe not the rain one). So. What. Does. That. Mean. I feel like I should feel bad about myself now.

Kristin: How are you supposed to read this without being right up in someone's personal space?

Kristin: "No new friends" is more or less what I fear every person I meet is thinking anyway, so this is at least being transparent about it.

Leo: Agreed. This is an effective mode of advertising that you will probably "have a cold" when someone texts you to hang out.

Kristin: So... in English, this shirt means "I don't like you good."

Leo: Kinda. But it for sure seems like caveman talk. I read good. Fashion fun. Shirt real good.

Kristin: Also, fun to note that in the reviews, one of the "pros" of this shirt is that it is "classy."

Kristin: Oh Look, the Unfunny And Insensitive T-Shirt Fairy left us a present!

Leo: I do this though!

Kristin: I sometimes do as well, but could you imagine coming across this in a store or in life if you had real issues with eating? Like, ugh.

Kristin: WHAT DOES THIS PHRASE MEAN? I tried googling it, but nothing? Is this phrase like one of those super high-pitched sounds that only teenagers can hear, because they have young ears?

Leo: I know what it means i'm just not telling you.

Kristin: That's just mean.

Leo: That was a joke. As far as I know, this is Kanye's latest sport vodka collaboration.

Kristin: This shirt is perfect if you have a vampire friend with a birthday coming up.

Leo: Live TRIBAL COOL AWESOME ACCENTS for the night FEATHERS COACHELLA FAIRY GIRL

Kristin: What exactly do feathers have to do with living for the night?

Leo: I obviously just explained it.

Leo: Definitive proof that where I live is officially the world's most uncool neighborhood.

Kristin: No one who actually lives in Silver Lake (or any other city for that matter) actually wears the name of their residential area on a T-shirt. That literally never happens.

Leo: I kinda think people in Brooklyn though...

Kristin: NO!

Leo: Although this does remind my that my local CVS makes these kinda island motif shirts that say "Silver Lake" on them and I've always thought of buying one. Did I just say that out loud?

Leo: This shirt might be brilliant.

Kristin: This is the shirt you wear if you like rap but you can't actually name any rappers.

Leo: This is the shirt you wear when you own that book white people love about decoding rap lyrics.

Leo: "The love, the music, and a fashion."

Kristin: JUST ONE FASHION. YOU ONLY GET ONE.

Leo: Balzac is rolling over in his grave.

Kristin: I think I'm going to buy this, and then just wear it for ten days straight. That would basically be performance art, right?

Leo: You wear that, then I'm gonna wear a shirt that says LAST CLEAN SHIRT IN THE WORLD.

Kristin: OK, this just says "Get your foot in the I love Paris."

Leo: Get in the love? I'm actually trying to concept this. Foot in the love... foot... foot?

Kristin: This is basically every Forever 21 shirt ever: it's got pithy advice, something in French, the name of a city.

Leo: But nothing about food or hashtags...

Leo: Barbie good. Barbie perfect. Also reads like caveman talk to me.

Kristin: Also, shouldn't there be a "Barbie Perfect" tee in non plus size? And why isn't there a "Ken Perfect" shirt for men? MISANDRY.

Leo: "Life in plastic, it's fantastic." Life in cotton-poly blend, it's GARBAGE.

Leo: This kind of presumes that somewhere, someone spells it New Yourk.

Kristin: More like "Same you, shittier apartment."

Leo: This shirt is broken.

Leo: This shirt needs to go spend some time with Oprah or like Joan of Arc or basically any female role model.

Kristin: I am making an audible noise of discomfort. But I do like that they made the all the "S"s into dollar signs, just in case you don't know what money is.

Leo: She's operating on the assumption that people automatically think she's dumb. Which, well, if you're wearing this shirt... just sayin'. Oh! Maybe this is some kind of meta joke. ::thinks:: No, no. Just kidding.

Kristin: To take the other side for a moment, if I owned this, it might be a really helpful visual aid for whenever I do something that makes no sense.

Kristin: OK, I laughed at this. I stand by that laugh 100%.

Leo: "Crêpe" is not pronounced like "crap." This is why the French think we are uncultured slobs.

Kristin: Still hilarious.

Leo: Love that classic WS. Willy S.

Kristin: Willy S. Coyote.

Leo: Forever 21 needs a subcategory for all their passive aggressive T-shirts.

Kristin: This is just inconsiderate. You are basically forcing other people to drive you places while you just sleep.

Leo: Right. Just say it, don't wear it.

Leo: They should go to jail for making this. Fashion jail.

Kristin: Don't buy this shirt unless you want to have a lot of conversations with concern trolls. Actually, that's probably a good reason to buy this shirt: You're going to figure out REALLY FAST all the people you don't want to talk to any more.

Leo: Maybe they thought plus-size women would feel like they were "taking it back from the man." Oy va voy.

Kristin: But in all honesty: If you just cross out the "he" and put in an "f" instead, it's actually a pretty good shirt.