1.
A highway underpass isn't memorable in a good way.
3.
This is SO MUCH safer.
4.
Always listen to kids.
5.
That whole tree in the forest thing works for everything.
6.
Vegetables are overrated.
7.
Keep things interesting.
8.
You only get one. Keep it safe.
10.
Never be the first to howl.
11.
Put your BB Gun in your CHECKED luggage when you fly.
12.
Just don't touch anything — ever.
13.
Learn to cook bacon — it's important.
14.
This is important too.
15.
If a fortune cookie gives you medical advice — take it.
17.
Some things are acceptable to wear in public.
19.
Never do anything that starts with this phrase.
20.
Dumpster babies aren't cool.
21.
Make your phone lock complicated so you can't figure it out when you drink.
22.
You can do anything you set your mind to — ANYTHING.
23.
Drink at bars on weekdays — you can't beat the specials.
24.
Sharp blades moving fast enough to lift a couple metric tons are DANGEROUS.
27.
And NEVER wear a hat with this sticker on it.