The Lyrics To The Full "Cheers" Theme Are Completely Insane

    Sometimes you want to go where your child isn't torturing animals.

    From 1982 to 1993, Cheers was America's television equivalent of the corner bar where everybody knows your name.

    Walk into any bar in America — or workplace, or grocery store — and start singing the Cheers theme song. Everyone will know all the words, right?

    Probably not — the full version of the theme song was rarely played on TV. It did however appear in this montage commemorating the 200th episode.

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    Let's take a closer look at those lyrics, courtesy of co-writers Gary Portnoy & Judy Hart Angelo:

    The protagonist of the Cheers theme is going through a lot more than your run-of-the-mill stressful workday.

    We'd probably need a drink too.