1.
The lead singer in the band.
3.
The friend with "benefits".
4.
The utterly shameless, doesn’t-care-who-knows-it player.
6.
The squirty, dorky guy you got with because you thought he’d be a good person, and WTF?
7.
The ladeez man in disguise.
8.
"The dog ate my homework” turd.