Buzz·Posted on Apr 30, 201914 Things Only People Who Hate Kids Will Understand, No OffenseLike, no offense to kids.by Syd RobinsonBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. First off, kids' hands are always ~mysteriously sticky~ and covered in slobber, and I'm sorry, but it's gross!!!!!!! haime @breakjimmy when a baby offers you a cheeto puff 05:24 PM - 27 Mar 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. They have absolutely no respect for alone time. At all. Megan @megan__coe I just want to take a nap 07:20 PM - 24 Apr 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Having to sleep in the presence of a creepy-crawly — aka a toddler — is your *LITERAL* nightmare!!!!!!!!! PregnancyVideo.Net @Pregnancy_Video Mom life: Is this how your nights go? 📹 https://t.co/MsXQgKUEuz 06:53 AM - 19 Apr 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. As is THIS. Ashola Ilie @adex0057 Dear girlfriends and wives, pls hang ur wigs where the kids can't reach.... I nearly collapsed last night in my own house.....I thought it was Amardiorha 07:52 PM - 05 Apr 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Also, kids aren't so great at grasping concepts. Like, come on, guys. Smoothie Bae @CoachPSays Let’s slander toddlers for a bit. They’re hide & seek skills are trash. They hide in the most obvious places, with their big ass heads sticking out talmbout “you can’t find me”... 02:28 PM - 06 Apr 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. And they can't read a room and always have to make everything about them!!! Sarcasm @ComedyPosts I hate when i’m trying to blow out birthday candles and little kids try to do it with me excuse u it’s not ur birthday so take a step back 11:42 AM - 10 Jul 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. You're honestly surprised so many places don't allow dogs but DO allow kids. View this photo on Instagram 8. You really mean it when you say you don't want to hold someone's baby. Like, really. moody monday @mdob11 *someone hands me a baby* Oh... no thank you *places baby on the ground* 02:33 PM - 25 Apr 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. Our priorities are just...different. Bec Shaw @Brocklesnitch sorry i cannot hold your baby i am not confident i would save it over my phone if i dropped them both 09:34 AM - 16 Aug 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. "Fuck them kids" has basically become your mantra for living your best life. 💁 Sahlt @AlyciaTyre This random girl commented on my photo and basically said I shouldn’t post pictures like that since there’s kids on Instagram and I replied and said “ fuck them kids “ lmao 05:28 PM - 17 Apr 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. You refuse to believe you were ever a *shudders* child yourself. Assata Shakoochie @jrdynjy "I hate kids" "But you were a kid once" 09:20 PM - 26 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. You want "Children are the best birth control" printed on a motivational poster. View this photo on Instagram 13. Children = varmint. No offense!!! 14. And lastly, instead of telling people you don't want kids, you should just start saying this. Jem 💀🎃 @Skelpyy Telling people “I don’t want kids”: -“You’ll change your mind one day” -“When you meet the right person...” -“You don’t understand, you’re not a parent” Telling people “My bloodline ends with me” -Dramatic -Your bloodline feels sacred and mystical -Vaguely threatening 08:02 AM - 24 Apr 2019 Reply Retweet Favorite